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Well, that means something more when you consider that swinging is something we just do for fun every now and then. Just like how you and your significant other may decide to go out for a fancy dinner as a way to be romantic on a Saturday, my wife and I may decide to unleash a fuck storm as ours. Despite what the term "lifestyle" may imply, it doesn't actually consume our lives.
But, it is an excellent alternative for curious monogamists to explore. In the lifestyle, everything is out in the open, and we happily hash out all the details. Brian and his wife run such a site, and it's very popular. "We have a half million members. We have 70,000 per day that visit," he said. "Our eye-opening experience, was 'wow, there are actually other people like us,' " Bob said. But watching had an impact on Bob and Tess at home.
They think perhaps their relationship just needs some spicing up, or that they’re just not monogamous people. But they find that swinging doesn’t fix their bond and that they, in fact, have fallen out of love. Many couples believe that swinging is the ultimate way to enhance trust in a relationship. They think that if you loosen your partner’s leash and let them play near the edge of acceptable behavior and they don’t push it, then you can trust them under any circumstances.
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It’s totally normal if you like the idea as a fantasy and not a reality. Perhaps you discuss it with your husband or reading swinging erotica. No one says you have to go out and become swingers if you don’t want to. However, the Internet makes it much easier to get into the lifestyle and find other swingers, especially if you’re from a more rural area and don’t have couple friends. One option is to post an ad on Craigslist or look for ads.
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Perhaps in a few years, it will be the "in thing" to be a swinger. Today, the LifeStyle is evolving and becoming more mainstream. As the quality of swinger events, websites and clubs improves, more people are willing to join the fun. Everyone appears to be getting laid on TV, social media, and in the movies… in real life, it’s actually kind of hard to find couples that are seriously looking for fellow swingers. One study showed 37% of husbands and 29% of wives admit at least one extramarital affair , and divorce-rates for first marriages approached 60%.
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Trust that even as a secondary or tertiary lover, you are still cared for and respected. To be sure, check to see if these groups or couples are into wife sharing for single guys before assuming anything. Some couples prefer watching and avoiding all physical contact, at least for the first time. “Hard” swap or full swap means partner trading for a whole night or at least a few hours. If the swinging couple likes your photos, they will talk to you and make sure you understand how things are going to go.
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My number one tip here is to just wear what you’d normally wear to a nightclub. It should be an outfit you feel comfortable in and which is easy to slip off. Before you go ahead and hookup, it might be a better idea to, first of all, arrange to meet other swingers for a chat. Whichever site you join, make sure to chat with people of swingers community. Get to know them and immerse yourself in the world of swingers. The good news is that I’ve been swinging for several years now.
Dating sites such as OkCupid and apps like Tinder can also help to connect you with swingers. Even if it’s set up for monogamous dating, you can specify that you’re a couple looking for another couple. You might have an ongoing swinging arrangement with a couple, or your interactions might be more like one-night stands. If you’re looking to fall in love with multiple people, then you’re talking about polyamory and not the swinging lifestyle.
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Talk to your partner if they like the couple you plan on engaging with. Even if you’re swinging with Bob and Mary who you’ve known for years. To set the best base for a successful conversation, make sure to bring it up at a time when you know your partner will be in a relaxed mood with no pressing tasks to attend to. After your first time swinging, you're going to have a lot of emotions! Hopefully they'll all be positive, but it's very likely that you might feel confused, guilty, or overwhelmed along with all the excitement. "Swinging is not prophylactic for troubled relationships. It won't prevent cheating, and it won't save a relationship. Swinging is only recommended for couples who feel secure in their relationships," Howard says.
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Adult Swingers are those interested in the LifeStyle who develop enough courage to investigate beyond the curiosity stage are often surprised when they discover how easy it is to find swingers so close to them. Those new to the LifeStyle often find that their preconceptions about the LifeStyle were way off. Swingers are not the middle-aged, overweight 1960's rejects as the stereotype suggests. They are normal people, the same people you see everywhere. They go to the grocery store, to the baseball game and to the movies. Numerous studies and polls give widely varying results on how many swingers there really are.